On Starting Again and the Power of Perseverance
November 20, 2014
Norwich Half Marathon 2014
November 24, 2014Today is the day I mark as the anniversary of the day I became self employed.
It was actually about a week ago that I walked out on the job from hell but today was the first entry on my accounting spreadsheet, so it’s the day I count as “officially self employed”.
So to celebrate, I shall share with you a cheeky little new outfit from Collectif, because OMG, it’s a ROLLER DERBY CARDIGAN!
♥ Skirt and Cardigan c/o Collectif ♥ Beret – eBay ♥ Shoes – Chie Mihara*♥
Traditionally on this day, I get a little soppy. Everyone has had a hideous job at some point in their lives, and after I graduated from university I had some pretty soul destroying jobs. I worked in telesales *shudder* and I worked for a company at which we were over worked and under appreciated and where I earnt almost half of the male employees doing the same job as me. Then, at the end of 2006, I was unemployed and took a job working as a Reception Manager for a local company.
The fact that I was asked at the interview by my (female) boss about whether I planned to have children and how my husband would feel if I was late home from work and got home after him should probably have rung some alarm bells, but it was a lovely looking office and everyone seemed friendly, so I took the job, like I had much choice! I won’t go into details about specific incidences, because it’s hard to remember them all to be honest, but I’ve never worked for such an appalling boss. Imagine Meryl Streep in the Devil Wears Prada, but with less shoes. After 3 months I handed in my notice, mentally crushed and with all the spirit knocked out of me. Instead I was asked by another department in the same company to move there, where I would have less direct contact with her. So I did, all positive about learning new skills which never really transpired, until 8 months later I was dragged into a disciplinary meeting over some ridiculous made up issues (they really were, but it would take up far too much dull space to tell you about it. Email me if you’re desperately nosey!) and I decided I just didn’t need to let this woman have this much control over my life anymore and handed in my notice.
So, in November 2007 I found myself unemployed again, feeling pretty down on myself after months of constant criticism, bullying, and being treated like like a personal slave. Christmas was coming, I had a cheque for my final salary and no idea where any money was coming from after that, so I decided to have a dabble in something I’d done a bit in the past, buying and selling second hand and vintage clothing on eBay.
I taught myself some basic HTML skills and set up a website to sell off. I learnt about social media and blogging to promote the shop, and I remembered the things that I was good at and enjoyed. One of my favourite parts was always writing the descriptions for my eBay items (packing them up and going to the post office, not so much) and 5 months later I set up a blog and started writing.
It took me a long time to get my confidence back, a very, long time, and like anyone I still have days of doubt, but it’s been worth it.
7 years later I run 2 pretty successful blogs, have set up local networks and events like the Vintage Norwich Awards and Norwich Cocktail Week, been invited to speak at conferences, got a qualification as a make up artist and run workshops, taught myself to set up websites and lots about social media, worked with brands and companies I would never have dreamt of, written for publications I admire, contributed to a published book and had opportunities I would never have thought possible.
I hear a lot of people wishing they could be self employed, and they’re always waiting for that perfect time. Being self employed is terrifying, the lack of a regular and predictable pay packet is not easy, and honestly, without the support of my family I’d have had to go back to something like temping to keep going, at least initially.
I still don’t earn as much as I earnt in that awful job, and my sporadic income still sometimes gives me stress, but I earn enough to get by, and sometimes enough to even do nice things, but the most important thing is I’m in control.
I really believe that if you give yourself time, and persevere, you will find your own path. We get so caught up as adults in how things “should” be. When I was in jobs that made me miserable I would torture myself with the idea that I should be doing something that was somehow more worthwhile. I looked into retraining as a Doctor, a Lawyer, a Midwife, going back to Nursing or becoming a Social Worker, but I think I would very likely have hated every single one of them. When I was a little girl I always wanted to be a writer, or a Princess, and I think that I’ve managed to make a career out of being both. I get to wear pretty frocks and write about things I love and I honestly couldn’t imagine a job that would suit me better. It might not be the most worthwhile job in the world, but it’s me.
Self employment isn’t for everyone, and I’m not suggesting everyone should just walk out on their job because they’re bored. It can be tough and, particularly if you have a family, sometimes there are sacrifices that just can’t be made. That doesn’t mean you need to resign yourself to a life of misery. Always remember, your job does not define you, it is simply the way you make money to live your life, and if your job is affecting your life that negatively, then it’s time to make changes. Whether those are to your, job, or your life.
It makes me sad when I hear people saying they genuinely hate their jobs, but can’t get out. You only have one life and spending it miserable just so you can afford to live in a bigger house, or buy shoes that don’t even make you happy anyway is a sad way to spend it.
When you were little what were your dreams? Did you take your toys to pieces and put them back together? Did you love spending time with animals, record “radio” shows or write newspapers for your friends? You might not be able to make it your job, but the beauty of modern life and the power of the internet is that you can make it part of your life, and you never know, maybe one day it will be a bigger part of your life, or maybe it will become your career.
You don’t need to know where you’re going straight away, there might be many twists and turns on your path, but thinking about the things you love, and you are passionate about is a good start.
As it turns out, I’m passionate about shoes, Roller Derby and lipstick, and these days that’s my job. So this is the perfect outfit to wear to celebrate. I’ll leave you with my new pose. Still working it, is it a keeper?
P.S If you love this Collectif outfit, then keep an eye out for the Advent Calendar Giveaway in December!
87 Comments
On 7 Years of Self Employment: Today is the day I mark as the anniversary of the day I became self employed. I… http://t.co/9zKwMhS1oQ
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What a lovely post! Sounds like you are much happier in your self employment 🙂
Go you!
x
Sounds like you are much happier being self employed! 🙂 Go You!
http://www.gingerbreadsmiles.co.uk
xox
@Retrochick_uk Good for you.I’ve had a terrible female boss before, who luckily was struck off (yes that bad!)I admire you for getting out.
Amen to that – love being self employed and you are right it is hard work and sole destroying at times but life is too short to not at least try and do what you love. Congrats on 7 years.
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RT @Retrochick_uk: On 7 Years of Self Employment and a new outfit from @CollectifLondon: http://t.co/dJClz2N0gG
Ah, I love hearing about self-employment stories that work out, it makes me feel hopeful about a future where it could even happen for me! I’m also glad that you’re honest about it being tough to start with, it would be disastrous if anyone thought it wasn’t! Unless you’re living off an inheritance or something… And this outfit is great – I just love Collectif so much I could burst! CC x
Thanks Gemma this is brilliant, & very inspirational for me at this moment in time!
Susie Pritchard You did go through my mind! It might not be easy, but it’ll be worth it!
Yes, hard work I’m prepared for, but I do think that 2015 is finally my time!
@Retrochick_uk I recently became self-employed after a nightmare job too and it’s things like this post that keep me optimistic. Thanks!
@Retrochick_uk An item on @theJeremyVine about self employment as I type!
I wouldn’t have it any other way – it is hard work but to be able to make a living(most of the time) from what I love is fabulous!!
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Congratulations.
Very inspiring story.
@Retrochick_uk Congratulations on your seventh anniversary!
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Thanks so much for sharing your story – it’s so good to hear what a positive difference going self employed made for you. I’ve been self employed for just over a year now and although there are times when it’s very scary and even quite lonely, I am absolutely loving it and the adventures it has lead me on.
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@Retrochick_uk congratulations on being in control for 7 years. Agree with so much in that post. X
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Thanks for sharing your story, I’ve had a nightmare female boss too and I know how soul destroying a horrible job can be. Congratulations on 7 years of self employment!
Thank you for sharing your experiences. It’s hard to give up the security of a job (even if it’s one you hate!), but you’re absolutely right, your life isn’t your job. Being happy is more important to me than being wealthy these days. Fabulous outfit btw! 🙂
So inspirational – this is why I love your blog, it always strikes a chord in one way or another. I chose self employment after my kids were born to try to work around school runs and assemblies etc, I think it’s MUCH harder work than being employed and I earn less, but it’s also much more rewarding. LOVE the ‘blowing a kiss pose’ by the way.
The story of how I became self employed. http://t.co/ibpEuLuZPn
I can’t believe that was 7 years ago! Congratulations to you missus. You’re an inspiration.
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When I was little I wanted to be a princess, or a model – and I feel like I’m finally getting to do that – like you say – what with the ‘pretty frocks’ and the support I now have that’s enabling me to have the confidence in my own worth & value to at least ‘play’ at being a model. I’m glad that you’re happy, people shouldn’t be working naff jobs to have things they don’t even really like, and I do believe that’s a problem of the modern style of our culture – so many people get so caught up in the latest “celebrity trend” and *have* to have whatever they have…
Hi Gemma, I really enjoyed this post. I’m self-employed too and I would never, ever go back to working for someone else. I’m a journalist and always wanted to go freelance (it’s what my dad does and he’s been freelance since I was a young child so it seemed completely normal to me to work in a home office, in your dressing gown, at the weekends, sometimes on Christmas Day, other times taking three weeks off because there’s nothing else to do…).
I did journalism and creative writing at uni and I was very lucky in that I knew and firmly decided aged 18 that I was going to be a journalist. This meant I knew from a young age that my ultimate career goal was to work as a freelancer. I got a reporter job straight after uni and fortunately got my dream reporter job 10 months later. I stayed in that second job for four years until about two and a half years ago and absolutely loved it.
I went freelance earlier than I had planned – I planned to leave London (I live in Milton Keynes and aside from uni have never lived in London) when I reached 30 but quit my job at 26 so I could work from home. My long-term relationship had ended, I had no money whatsoever when I moved back in with my parents, I couldn’t afford rent and bills as a single person and as long as I continued to commute to London I had no hope of saving a penny. My train ticket to the office was more than £5,000 a year so I decided that even if I didn’t work very much, the £5,000 a year travel saving and free accommodation at my parents’ house meant it didn’t matter to begin with. I was lucky to have that security.
More than two years later I am incredibly busy with work and I have savings for the first time in my life, meaning I can seriously think about leaving my mum and dad’s house and looking after myself properly. I’m saving to buy my own house so now my biggest concern is getting a mortgage, not cash flow. It has made an enormous difference to my quality of life and I feel very lucky every day that I can what I love from home and choose my work load.
If you can do what you do or what you want to do as a freelancer – whatever that is – I highly recommend it. Some people get terrified and go back to a salary job at the first opportunity. Others keep their nerve and make a success of it. My dad always says that freelancing is like walking a tightrope over Niagara falls – keep your head up and keep moving forward and you’ll be fine. But if you stop to look down it will frighten the life out of you.
And people in salary jobs always tell me they could never find the motivation to get anything done if they worked from home, to which I reply money and the ability to buy food is the only motivation you need.
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ahhhh love it, made me a bit teary! You have done amazingly and are definitely an inspiration (LOVE the skirt! I have to wait till payday to buy it though!)
Makes me teary too. I always get soppy this time of year!
Love your outfit, red hat and red shoes wow they are really beaitfull. Amazing.
xxx
http://www.noragouma.com
@Retrochick_uk great post! pretty much my story too… why are all the worst bosses female?! xx
Fabulous post by “@Retrochick_uk: The story of how I became self employed. http://t.co/qTL55HRqWK”
@Retrochick_uk great positive post and you look hot in that cute outfit herez to your next 7 years
Awesome & inspiring! RT @Retrochick_uk The story of how I became self employed. http://t.co/aSqi8tHvZH …
Re: your comment about not being the most worthwhile job in the world…..I ask: How do you know? Sometimes, when it’s a very tough day and there is absolutely nothing to smile about in my world, I can always pop in to your blog, and for those few moments in the day, I have something to smile about. And I’m sure I’m not the only one.
Give yourself a big “Well done!”…..you are doing something you love and that makes others happy……how much more worthwhile can you get?
Oh that’s lovely! Thank you for saying that, it’s a really nice thing to hear!
Hell Yeah! I quit my job in Jan after 10+ years of soul destroying jobs – always battling with horrible bosses or that one person that would make it their mission to be make my job even worse! It was the best thing I ever did. Don’t get me wrong it was absolutely terrifying but I now LOVE what I do even though its super hard and unlikely to become a millionaire soon I am a much nicer & happier person for it. I really love stories like these and I also recommend Careershifters http://www.careershifters.org/ as I love reading inspiring stories as I used to think I was stuck forever in my rubbish jobs x
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Dear Gemma,
Such a deep and personal post deserves it:
*round of applause*
Now, there’s a sentence I know well, and I feel every day: “bullying, and being treated like like a personal slave”. From being called on a Sunday with such questions as “What should I do if I saw a decomposing swan in a pond?”, over baing dragged to act as a translator (but not invited to have lunch, hence: standing next to bosses chair and yapping away, while they are shoveling sopu with their soppns).. up to missing out appointments with my surgeon because one of his personal friends wanted a guided tour (she was “in the neiborhood” and needed someone to give her some fun time).
…gawd – I’m complaining like there’s no tomorrow.
I’ll go now.
(I might email you about this…)
..
Againg: GREAT WOMAN, that’s what you are. And a BRAVE WOMAN.. just in case you didn’t know it. 🙂
Marija
What a brilliant post – and those shoes are divine!
What a wonderful story. Thank you so much. We small biz people need to be reminded that there are others out there doing what we are learning to do. I love your site and wish you more success. Happy 2015!
i stumbled up on your blog on the UK’s top 20 bloggers and you have already inspired me!! I’m 19 and have already made a lot of educational mistakes chasing careers i know ill most likely hate. Just because they are the ‘normal’ careers and that’s what everyone else is doing. i love that you are now dong what you love after a storm of job disasters! it gives me hope and motivation! I hope you carrying on doing what you love and that you grow bigger, better and more successful!