Dear Diary

This Week I….

Um, hi! How’s things?

Thank you for all your lovely comments last week, and you’ll be pleased to know that this week I am writing this from home, at least temporarily. There is still surgery and hospital visits in my future, but right now the Pugs are snoring next to me and I am waiting for my parents to drive all the way from Kent just to have lunch with me, which is nice!

The future will no doubt happen in its own inevitable way, but first, this week I….

Spilled Bean Juice

So, while I was in hospital I attempted to make the effort to get “dressed” each day. By “dressed” I mean let’s wear pyjama bottoms and a t-shirt or vest rather than my nightdress all day. Let’s not go nuts.

So on Sunday I put on a nice clean white t-shirt and ordered a suitably beige jacket potato with beans for my supper.

Eating in bed isn’t the easiest, so I carefully placed a napkin over my front.

This is where the inevitable bean juice dropped.

Goddamit.

Saw my spine

I’d read the report, I’d been told about the basically missing vertebrae, but I had not seen the picture until a Monday visit from my surgical team.

Jeepers. I’m sure this isn’t right. For the record, that squidgy bit is BONE not disc.

So on the plus side. I don’t have a slipped disc. Yay!

Had my first General Anaesthetic

Outcome of the surgical meeting was that no surgery was happening super imminently until they knew exactly what was going on in that spine.

That meant step one was to do a biopsy of the bone. So on Tuesday morning I was wheeled into surgery for my first ever General Anaesthetic.

I went to sleep and woke up super thirsty with 2 holes in my back and then tipped water all down my chest because I don’t know how glasses work and that’s just the kind of person I am apparently.

Needed a Wee

If you’re a TMI kind of person then look away now, but I find this an amusing story of the workings of my body. So let’s crack on.

I am a renowned frequent weeer. I need a wee ALL THE TIME. I leave the pub 10 minutes away and when I get home I am desperate for a wee.

So, obviously, they wouldn’t let me get out of bed post biopsy, but despite having drunk nothing for 12 hours I needed a wee.

They put me on a bed pan, and my bladder did not want to play. I dreamed of rushing water, I relaxed, I pushed, I dreamed about toilets, then someone upstairs flushed a toilet and I managed to squeeze a little bit out and gave up.

3 hours and 750 ml of water later I was allowed to “mobilise to the bathroom” where I did an epic wee, which as I flushed I noticed was approximately the colour of the orange vitamin B tablets I drink each day.

So I decided to cause consternation among the staff, until 3 hours and another 750ml of water later it was determined I was dehydrated.

Good story huh. I hope this serves to ease the mind of anyone who in future had terrifying post surgery wees.

Cried till they let me go home

So, I’d been told that after the biopsy I could go home that afternoon.

Approximately 3pm I was told my drugs had been ordered and I needed to see the physios, who turned up and watched me walk and said “yeah fine”.

Mr LLL was on alert to come fetch me when the drugs came in and approximately 7pm I rang my buzzer to ask for an update. The update was “oh, you’re not going today, you need to see the OT first and they all left at 4:30”

So I cried. It was a shock. I was tired, 5 days ago I’d popped in for an MRI and never gone home.

An OT assessment basically checks if you can go to the bathroom, wash your face etc, all the things I’d been doing for myself during my hospital stay so I felt a bit like a box ticking exercise.

Eventually the senior nurse agreed that I could go home if I signed to say I was happy without an OT assessment. Which I did.

So by 9pm I was home and eating a burger that wasn’t even yellow.

Had a birthday

It started a little unorthodox with a visit to the hospital where I took cake to the consultant and learned that next week I would be having a bone marrow biopsy and another MRI to see if the steroids had made any difference, and then a follow up appointment the week after to hopefully get some answers and a surgery date.

After that it contained a nap and then a Zoom quiz with my first alcoholic drink in a week.

I got some nice pressies and one of my PT clients stopped by with flowers which was lovely.

It was Mr LLL birthday too, but the last week meant I basically ordered his gifts with the Sainsbury’s order so he got Tequila and birthday Oreos!

Mr LLL also cunningly converted a caterpillar cake into a Pug cake, which was very cool. But apparently he doesn’t like cake, so I have to eat the whole thing (oh no.)

Moved into a cloud

For months I have been obsessed with Oodies. They look cosy and I’ve been spending a lot of time lying around doing nothing. But they are expensive. So I looked at cheaper versions but knew they would be disappointing.

Facebook stalked me with ads for Oodies constantly, and soon I could think about nothing but Oodies.

So Mr LLL bought me one for my birthday. It’s like living in a cloud. I love it. Only problem is we now have to cancel Summer as it will be too hot.

Had a BBQ in the Rain

Because there’s still 48 hours until we’re allowed to socialise indoors, and our planned birthday trip with friends to an outdoor foody place was cancelled.

So instead they came round and we sat under a gazebo in the rain and had a BBQ. It was tasty and nice to see people, even if I had to alternate lounging like an invalid and perching uncomfortably on the edge of the garden bench.

I did not take photos, that’s how nice it was.

We also got birthday presents, including a candle that is so pretty I don’t want to burn it with crystals in it.

And that, was another week in my life.

I know a broken back is a *bit* of an elaborate way of making my weekly updates more interesting, but I do what I can.

How was your week?

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